The FBI has found itself in possession of the iPhone owned by the San Bernardino terrorist shooter and now wants full access so they can play Candy Crush and Trivia Crack without exceeding their data usage for the month on their own phones. The FBI has gone as far as to take it to a federal judge that has in turn demanded that Apple unlock the shooter's phone. The FBI is currently unable to figure out the passcode on the iPhone and has been struggling with the four-digit code.
"We've tried everything! It's not 4911 like we suspected. We hereby demand that Tim Cook open his backdoor to us! Just let us put the tip in! We got these wack ass Obama phones, bruh! Let us use this dope ass iPhone, cuz!" a federal spokesperson stated in a press conference.
Tim Cook has released a public letter to everyone letting them know that they will not be cooperating with the FBI and that they will be keeping the four-digit code a secret.
"Apple believes this is an egregious abuse of federal power and we will not be spreading our backdoor wide open for the Feds. Fuck off!" Cook stated.
Janet Reno has come out of retirement and is currently in a standoff at Tim Cook's mansion with ATF agents equipped with guns and fire to flex their nuts on Mr. Cook. if he does not cooperate.
The story is still developing...
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